Wednesday, May 06, 2015

The Quality of mercy is not strained ..



The famous quote by William Shakespeare - as delivered by Portia in the Merchant of Venice - is on my mind today, for what is justice really, if not tempered with Mercy.

The act that brought about these thoughts - is the act that almost brought the twitter-verse down today - the conviction of Salman Khan (Indian Actor) for 5 years as he was found guilty of charges of culpable homicide.

Lets review the facts of the case as we know it :

1. in 2002 the actors car rammed into a bakery - killing 1 and injuring 4 others who were sleeping on the pavement nearby

2. The actor who fled the scene - later claimed he was not driving the car - but his driver was

3. The driver accepted that he was driving - and that the car went out of his control due to a flat tire

4. There were witnesses who claimed otherwise - and confirmed that the actor himself was driving the car

5. The actor was under the influence of alcohol

Now a court has ruled and found the actor guilty on all charges and sentenced him to 5 years. The nation is divided on the verdict - one half thinking justice was served and this proves that the rich cannot escape the justice whereas the other half claiming the actor did not deserve the verdict.

Before we go any further - let me make it clear - that i believe in holding a person accountable for their actions. If it was indeed proved that the actor was guilty - then a sentence to hold him accountable for his actions is necessary and absolutely required.

But where i waver is - how is a sentence that puts in him jail for 5 years (for what can only be termed as gross negligence ) of any value other than *MAYBE* making an example out of him!

In cases such as this - where we are holding a person accountable for the stupidity of their actions rather than any premeditated attempt at murder - should the justice then not review the case on a case-by-case basis when doling out a sentence?

How for example does putting him in jail help :

1. The victims family - who are affected by the death and probably reduced to further poverty
2. Help avoid such incidents in the future or make any change in the 2 root causes of this event
     a. Drunken Driving
     b. People sleeping on the street.

If the goal is simply to make an example out of him - then have we achieved even that? On conviction - he was able to use his significant resources and get interim bail faster than a normal person would under similar circumstances! what kind of an example is that??

Au contraire - we have convicted someone who is known for his support for humanitarian charities in India - negating any positive influence he might have in the future towards such causes!!!

Would it not be more helpful if in cases such as this - the justice was tempered with mercy ?

As I said before - in cases such as this it would serve us better to review the case on a case by case basis. In this case we know the actor has substantial monetary resources available, we also know that he has substantial sway in the community - so why then not use that to help the nation instead of putting him in jail !

Why can the sentence not be for example :

1. Monetary help for the affected family
2. 5 years of ONLY community service for the actor (no "for profit" work during this time)
     -- Have him spearhead a campaign for reducing drunk driving
     -- Have him work with organizations and mobilize (and in his case also maybe bankroll) the building of shelters in the city for people to sleep at night - get them off the street!
     -- Use his stardom for good - other causes that the government needs to push during these 5 years!

The above would not only penalize him and hold him accountable but it would also actually HELP others in the process. All putting him in jail (if he ever does go there) seems to do is add another burden on the tax payers money!!

My main reason for these thoughts are also slightly selfish - I put myself in his shoes. No one that I know can claim to have never done anything stupid. If I am someday where he is - and god-forbid, am responsible for another persons death due to gross negligence on my part - how would i like to be treated?

I would already be remorseful (as any sane human being should be) but add to that - the justice system would throw me in jail with real criminals where my own chances of survival would be minimal! I for sure will not be able to pay my way out and get bail / hire the most expensive lawyers to keep the justice system tied for many more years via appeals!! I (unlike Mr. Khan here) WILL end up in jail!

Would it not make sense if the system gave me a chance to do better - to make up for it rather than die for it myself? People ask why the actor didn't fess up that he was driving in the first place - but knowing our justice system and the way it works - my question is - would you??

As we extract our pound of flesh from Mr. Khan - I leave you with the words from Shakespeare that are on my mind :

The quality of mercy is not strain'd,
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath: it is twice blest;
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes:
'Tis mightiest in the mightiest: it becomes
The throned monarch better than his crown;
His sceptre shows the force of temporal power,
The attribute to awe and majesty,
Wherein doth sit the dread and fear of kings;
But mercy is above this sceptred sway;
It is enthroned in the hearts of kings,
It is an attribute to God himself;
And earthly power doth then show likest God's
When mercy seasons justice. Therefore, Jew,
Though justice be thy plea, consider this,
That, in the course of justice, none of us
Should see salvation: we do pray for mercy;
And that same prayer doth teach us all to render
The deeds of mercy. I have spoke thus much
To mitigate the justice of thy plea;
Which if thou follow, this strict court of Venice
Must needs give sentence 'gainst the merchant there.
— The Merchant of Venice, Act 4, Scene 1






Monday, April 20, 2015

Life Lessons and Soccer



As a mom I try to imbibe "life lessons" in everyday play with my 3 year old …

For example A puzzle with a missing piece becomes a lesson on the importance of clean-up
or
Reading a book becomes a lesson on imagination - so we can create new stories to continue the book that has ended
or
Playing soccer - becomes a lesson in competition


- there are times however - like today - when he in-turn teaches me something - today was a lesson in contradictions for me ..

We were playing a game of soccer in the yard and usually we play by turn (so I would kick the ball to him and he would kick it back to me and so on - taking turns).
Today I decided to play some "hard ball" with him..I didn't give him the ball - but kept kicking it myself..when it went far - i ran to it before he could and kicked it again..

He protested - and I told him - well, if you want the ball you have to learn to take it from me..you have to be quicker than me, you have to play smart and take the ball from mommy.

Initially he played along - but then he stopped play - he motioned for me to sit down - and the conversation went like below

Aariv : "Mommy - you're not sharing the ball"
Mommy : "But I told you - if you want the ball - you just need to get to it before I do"
Aariv : "But why?!"
Mommy : "Because thats how this game is played"
Aariv : "But you also say sharing is good"
Mommy : "Uh Yes - it is..but the game.."
Aariv : "If the game does not let you share - then the game is not good - lets play share-ball and not soccer ball - OK?"

I guess we will learn about healthy competition another day, for now :

Mommy : 0 Aariv : 1

Game on!


Friday, April 17, 2015

Work-Life Balance




 

We've heard these 3 words so many times in our professional lives - most companies in the US (and probably elsewhere) make a big deal about trying to help ensure their employees achieve this balance. But when is that balance truly achieved - and is it ever?

I've heard the balance is achieved when you are successful at work and in your life! So the question then is - how do you measure success in your life?

Success at Work for example - is well defined and measured by your career growth . We work on a schedule - that we strive to meet, we work on a budget - that we try to stay within, we travel - for business needs, we attend conferences - to learn and connect with our peers, we take classes - to stay competitive - all of the above is time bound and absolutely essential for our professional careers - and our success is tied to doing all of the above

Success in Life on the other hand - is rather subjective. For most people it is only spending quality time with your family that counts as success in life - and since most companies in the US (at least in technology) - will allow you the flexibility in working that helps you achieve that quality time - can we then say we've achieved work life balance?!

Just like at work - shouldn't we have more metrics by which to measure a successful life? Spending daily quality time with family is important, but so are other things that contribute to the term life and finding the time for these is important to be successful at life too - for e.g. -  Ensuring yearly vacation travel - to gain new experiences and broaden your horizons, timely financial planning - for retirement, your death AND your today, health and fitness - ensuring you work out for a healthier you, providing a variety of learning experiences to your child - beyond school and travel and of course shared household duties - very important in cases where both spouses work - it takes effort to make your home life run smoothly and a successful life is only possible when that effort is shared!

While most of us do spend that daily quality time with our families - do we really have all our ducks in a row when it comes to these other things - or are we sometimes prioritizing our work deliverables over these other "life" metrics. If we are - then have we truly achieved work-life balance?